Tired

Thinking about this future makes me so nervous it hurts sometimes. I hate the idea of college. There's absolutely no guarantee, that just just because I have a good degree, that I can get a good job. With how much you have to put into it, some insurance would be nice. That's not how the world works though (I say naively as if at my young age I have an even a remote understanding of how the world works). I really don't want the rest of my life to shitty because I was forced to make a shitty decision about what I want to do for the rest of my life when I'm only 18 years old or so. I don't even know if I want to go to college at this point, even though I have another year to decide. There's a pressure to figure it all out , and then do so many things to attempt to get there. It's this huge amount of overwhelming things, that just gives me the overwhelming urge to do absolutely nothing.